1. Allow yourself to cry as much as you can, as often as you want and every time you feel like doing so.
Don’t hold back. Tears connect our shattered soul to the source of strength we never knew where. In the early days after losing a child, the emotional task is overwhelming. Scream if you want, punch bag, throw pillows. Do anything physical except when to do so would hurt someone including yourself!
2. Find ways to express your emotions.
Talk about your feelings and thoughts. Write about it. I’ve seen mothers receiving a tremendous amount of peace after connecting with the child they lose by writing to them. They were able to adjust to their new norms with grace and compassion in a relatively short period of time.
3. Continue what you are doing before you lose your child.
When impossible to do so, find new things to engage with no matter how difficult. You will stumble and fall but keep trying. There are times you wouldn’t want to get out of your bed and wish everything is over only to face the fact that it is not. It’s alright but try getting up again moment by moment, one small step at a time. Doing something shifts the focus out of the devastation you are going through. Many times by trying to get out and do something for others the bereaved find a new sense of mission and a new way of living.
4. Connect with people who are going through the same.
Read and listen to their stories. You will realize you are not alone. You will find hope and better ways of dealing with yourself. You will meet new friends connecting to you on the deepest level even without seeing them personally.
5. Meditate and give yourself ample of time.
Gradually you will realize that you did not really lose your child after all. Nothing really dies. When we leave this earth, our body goes back to the element where it came from transforming into a new form of being. The hurt and the pain we cause with each other eventually stop because those feelings were only possible on the earthly existence. Love is the only thing that will remain because only love is eternal